Uh Oh…..”Today!”

Wanna break today from “serious” stuff?  I do…so let’s rest today. We can get back in the saddle tomorrow. (Oh, and after reading all this you’ll understand the dog leaping off the cliff picture!)

Most of us from time to time have a “Today” in which really ridiculous things happen to us — you know, those things that when they happen you just shake your head, slap your forehead with your open palm, and think, “Geez,  I am probably the most unlucky person on Earth!”  Well, we’re not the only ones that feel that way.  As tough as those things are, remember when they happen to you, the rest of us have the same or similar things happen to us….like these people:

Uh Oh!

“Today, brand new cocktail dress: $300. Matching peep toe heels: $100. Getting my hair done at the salon: $80. Treating myself to a mani/pedi: $50. When finally meeting the guy I have been chatting online with for 2 months, I find out he’s my cousin: priceless.”

 

“Today, I was a substitute teacher for a history class and the class was taking a test. About halfway through, I noticed one kid had a small piece of paper in his hand. I ran up the row, grabbed his test, and ripped it into four pieces. Then I took the note from him. It said ‘I believe in you, -Mom.'”

 

“Today, my boss fired me via text message. I don’t have a text messaging plan. I paid $0.25 to get fired.”

 

“Today, my first girlfriend of over 3 years left me for another guy. She said she’s looking for someone who can financially provide for her in the future. The dude owns a T-Mobile kiosk. I’m going to medical school.”

 

“Today, I found out that my sister who is 16 years older than me is actually my biological mother. She and my parents decided it was best that I didn’t know who my real mother was, and to be raised by my grandparents as their child. I’ve always hated my sister.”

 

“Today, I texted my college boyfriend to tell him how terrible I felt about cheating. He replied saying he was so relieved because he had been cheating on me with a girl in his dorm. I was talking about my math exam.”

 

“Today, my boyfriend of 2 years took me to get a tattoo done with his name on. He paid for it. After it was done he told me it was over between us and he thought it’d be a nice reminder of him for me.”

 

“Today, it’s my 18th birthday. My parents got me a $5 gift certificate to iTunes. It came for free with the iPhone they just bought my sister for her middle school graduation.”

 

“Today, my boyfriend told me he’d drive me to the jeweler’s to pick out a ring. We drove there, I picked the ring, and the sales person rang it up. I glanced at my boyfriend, only for him to reply, ‘Well don’t look at me!'”

 

“Today, I realized after turning in my resume to over 100 job openings over the past month, that the resume I’ve been submitting does not have my phone number or any other contact information besides my name.”

 

“Today, my parents punished me and made me wash my mouth out with soap for cursing. I’m almost 19. I said the word ‘hell.'”

 

 


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